i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
