and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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