Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
