we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
she looked like the before picture.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Randomize
