i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
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