I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize
