operation have a gay friend backfired
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
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