it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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