You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
