I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
