It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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