And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
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