I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Randomize
