Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
