ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
