Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
You can't just leave with hair like that
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize
