idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I have fence marks all over my body
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Randomize
