i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
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