if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
He uses pillows to masturbate.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
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