She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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