I have demons in me.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
