how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
my sisters under your porch take her home
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
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