Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
