went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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