Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
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