i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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