I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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