We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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