Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Randomize
