so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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