I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
