Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
