I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
