Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
