He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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