Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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