She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Drake has all the answers
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize