but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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