Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
