I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I stole a fireplace last night.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
