Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
He uses pillows to masturbate.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
