**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
i out mim tonsoeep
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
