i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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