Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Randomize
