chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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