Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Randomize