If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Someone shit on the floor
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Randomize
