No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Randomize
