I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
accomplished twins. life is a go
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Randomize
