For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Randomize
